George W. Bush: A Revisionist Retrospective
With George W. Bush about to leave office, we figure it’s about time to pay tribute. Unfortunately, it is hard to pay tribute using actual facts, so Apoliticus has decided to make some shit up. Here is a presidency in pictures: George W Bush’s Revisionist Retrospective.
November 2000-George W. Bush wins an uncontested, landslide victory on a platform focusing on the growth of renewable energy, a roll back of defense spending and an investment in biotechnology and cutting edge stem cell research.
Bush's VP Dick Cheney, a peace loving, environmentalist and a staunch advocate of responsible corporate governance, helped keep him focused on the right war to fight: namely, the war against poverty. Otherwise, he was totally hands off
Bush never shakes hands...he greets all heads of state with the chest bump, much to the chagrin of the diplomatic corps, who have to explain the gesture to India, Ghana and Turkmenistan after they threaten to recall their diplomats...
The world is left bewildered as US Secretary Of State Colin Powell goes to present before the UN, looks down at his notes and mutters this is bullshit. He walks out immediately afterwards. Nothing comes of it.
Bush vows to outlaw orange jumpsuits. Everyone caught wearing one is detained in Cuba. Underground jumpsuit clubs emerge all across the nation.
Donald Rumsfeld, Bush's Secretary Of Defence, died tragically early in Bush's second term when his brain exploded from pondering all of the known unknowns and the unknown unknowns...
With the economy doing fine, no one ever gets to know Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson. George W Bush even forgets his name at a news conference, sending Paulson into a bout of depression which culminates in him painting remember me on his chest and streaking naked across the white house lawn.
George Bush is a sorry assed excuse for a red-blooded American! At least the new guy can fart and chew gum at the same time. We are petitioning Gretchen “the redneck woman” and Toby Keith to come up with a new song for Obama!
Very funny fake stuff. And Redneck how good is that gum and fart tasting!
hmm, this is good. Such a perfect world…
Surely you can do better than this!
This shit should be taken down since the sleazy liars who “voted” Obsama into office cry racism every time someone pokes fun at him. Fuck Obsama AND the dirty racists who don’t like people criticizing him. Bush is out of office. It’s YOUR turn you pussy commies.
there is evidently more sleazy liars in this country than i presumed.
millions and millions.
and millions.
how do we function as a society (?)
Hey, take it easy and learn to laugh at yourself. I’m a Repub and I laughed my ass off at this.
Yes, I second the motion. Bush is out of office. MOVE ON !
Bush kept a second attack out of the country for five years. Obama also had a serious one his second year. Bush handled pretty well the terrorists the trained in this country during the CLINTON administration under his SAD SAD watch. They were here while he was president!
Bush is gone. Obama has yet to step up to the presidency. He is only average.
Really?! …Really?! Bush kept a second attack out of the country for five years? Which country? Not this one. It seems every time someone with a tan jaywalks it’s a terrorist attack on Obama’s watch but you clever idiots conveniently forget about or brush off those little incidents like the anthrax attacks, the DC sniper attacks, that little shooting at LAX, that guy at UNC-Chapel Hill “jihading” in his SUV over all those kids, that guy with the bomb in his Nikes on that plane….etc.
Oh man what a crap storm those things would’ve stirred up if they happened after January 2009.
And oh yeah, Bush reeeaaally handled those terrorists soooo well. Almost as well as he handled the deficit and his public speaking. I mean, only THE worst attack and loss of american lives on his watch. But that wasn’t his fault according to a certain “news” outlet…it actually didn’t even happen while he was president or didn’t even happen at all.
Yes, Bush is gone, thankfully so, but the horrible taste he left in the world’s mouth is going to make it hard to move on for decades. So get used to it.
W was the best president we ever had!
Best President Ever… Are you f@*king smoking crack. He is a sorry excuse for a man much less a president and I glad he is gone. I only wish that one day, one great day he and him buddy Cheney are rotting in prison for the crimes they committed while in office. Best President Ever, That is just too funny
Hey eyeswideopen,
That is an awesome observation, that is, what time it is. You should start a new movement call it MOVE ON, get people elected that will help us move. I’ve got a three bedroom apartment and I need to downsize, could use your help. Bush’s help too. Not Cheney though, I don’t want any exploding heart lawsuits.
I’m executing a thing of the identical interest and having note with this .Thanks.